6 Beliefs

There have been alot of confusion upon what I believed in. Some believed that I believed in nothing at all while other's think that I am attempting to recreate a new age thing or some believed that I am a derivation of something existing and I am trying to usurp their position. Normally I do not bother with trying to categorize who is the subset of what and vice versa. I do not attempt to trace my origins but I would try to write out what I believed in- and the rest is out of my hands and I leave it to you to decide.

Firstly I do not attempt to answer the question whether god or other ther-worldly things exist. I find it a futile attempt because if it would really exist, I believed that everyone would be the first to know or last to know. Because then in this case, we would have an utopia or dystopia on this world. Till that day comes, I would stay as an agnostic- a belief that something supernatural exist but we just do not know what it is- because I do not believed I know everything and can always make the best decision every time and even if we can know everything- we are restricted by the language that we speak.

Secondly, contrary to popular belief that I am a lazy bastard- I believed that we reap what we sow. Therefore sitting at home and doing nothing, pretending that something will drop from the sky and save us from our misery is just wishful thinking. The only reason that I did that was rather altruistic- however naive that might have sound. My thoughts was that I thought it was best to write as often as I could and to help as many as I could given some form of special privilege- but it was just that the world moved faster than I could write. Hence some new fangled stuff probably replace what I have written without me getting any leverage on that.

I knew it was rather silly of me to believed that but I took a risk- and not all risk are for self-interested reasons only- and it was a notion to believed that I had a pipe dream to be an Internet Star or the next the J K Rowling. This was nothing further from the truth. Perhaps it would be good to expand on the above. We often assume risk is associated with reward- and the first thing that comes to find is material rewards. Therefore then, in this case, when we took risk, it must be for the reason of more personal rewards.

But the thing is that it is true that to a certain degree, I did it for self-interested reason- but if we increase risk just to increase more rewards, then a person with mountains of cash would have reaped the most rewards isn't it. But because he had put in mountains of case, wouldn't that mean, he had to expect mountains of cash to come back to him as well. What have I got to lose- time. I did not really put in a ton of effort at the same time, neither did I put in any money- but what I gotten back: the very fact that you are still reading this blog in spite of my so-called "scandals".

But of course, I would not know the material rewards resulting from this effect but this is a commodity of which many people spends tons of effort, money and time doing it- I did it just by sitting at home and typing away. I can foresee right now, some person trying to replicate this effect just at this current moment, but you would have put in alot more effort just to differentiate yourself from me- and perhaps then it would be time for me to move on to some other things.

Thirdly, I do not discriminate anyone based on their race, religion or other forms of obvious markers. The only reason I ever appear to be so otherwise was that: I am human. I have my own personal preferences. I do not need to explain to anyone why I choose one over another just because he/she was different from the rest. I am choosing what I eat, wear and other things- I am not writing a policy here.

Fourthly, that I loved money more than anything else in the world. I have a depleting bank account and net worth, and yet I do not worry about getting my next meal. The reason is that I took a risk, and I knew that this would have an impact- and I had to deal with it when the time comes. If I had worried about the next meal, I wouldn't even have taken this step in the first place. Then it is that, the money is a means to an end but the end would be that the money would eventually have to be taken care care off for the end to have any chance of succeeding. It is that I shed my assets and money- and had I taken the route of seeing the money as the end goal and the only goal, I would have sat in my cushy job and not have done anything in the first place. There was not even a need for me to do that if that was my only reason.

Fifthly, I do not care what you believed in or what you think that of what I think of you. I do not hold like hold long term grudges neither do I detest anyone based on their personal beliefs or habits. And of course like anyone, I expect basic level of social manners, hygiene and presentation- other than that, I do not hold like a personal vendetta towards anyone.

Lastly, that I imposed my views upon others: like what I have said at the start of this entry, I can only say things that I believed to my best ability is true, accurate and beneficial. The rest like I say is up to you. 

Suddenly I appear all the more normal and no different from each and everyone of you.

There are no sweeping statements there neither are there any ambitious proclamations- therefore I leave it to you to decide is there anything quite conflictual in my beliefs.

Eugene