I have been smart and I always have a way around things. At the same time, I have an uncanny ability to know what people want. This makes me more important than I am actually made out to be.
I have ability to connect to people and somehow flesh out their inner most fear's and make the best out of them- I also have the ability to see people on all different levels. The difference however is not mutual. This means that I know what people want and that doesn't mean people know what I want.
The problem becomes extremely chronic when everyone has an vested interest in me- and everyone thinks that they have my best interest at heart and knows exactly I want or should want- but in reality, they merely project their wishes or desires onto me. They merely see what they don't have or wish to have onto me- and for some cosmic reason- that they would attain a certain amount of fulfillment from that.
You can only do that if you are an inanimate object like God or some idol where the only response- you would get is one asking you to do your own part and not projecting your own image onto somebody else. This is further compounded by the emotional attachment and investment that some have placed onto me as I am able to reflect their fears and desire in a manner of which they have hardly felt such intensity for.
Hence they have unhealthy possession over something which they do not know very well- thinking that they have a right over something simply because a connection has been made. Hence they have placed me on a pedestal of which I am quite unworthy of. I have become nothing more than a collection of qualities which they believed to be idealized version of someone they aspire to be or should be or want to be.
Maybe, I am better in many areas than many but that does not make me an ideal. Hence the only response for many hence is not one of understanding or recipocricity but rather one of master/slave, higher/lower, worker/manager type of relationship- simply because any other way makes me that difficult to understand. They justify all these actions simply circularly believed that they have the right hence they can do what they want.
Maybe the above is all really just very abstract things to most, but in sum, what this means is that, when you have the right or believed that you have the right- justify by some reason that you deemed is altrusitic or otherwise; which crosses the conscience barrier-, it doesn't mean you can do anything. Just because you can doesn't mean that you should. I can evoke the conscience argument again, but it just simply means that, some part of you will die when you do that however you strongly feel about that.
Eugene Signing off.
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
When it is time, it is time
There are many guys whom have absolutely the wrong idea about me. They have the idea that I know everything but in reality, I am just being used by women to get what they want from men. I am nothing more than the bait and the reward is nothing more than stringing all the guys along just to get what they want. I am not too sure who is the guy who really got fooled. The guy who got fooled the most is the one led by the nose by the actions of others rather than the person who is being targeted as the fool.
In reality, I am already privy of what they want in their head, most of the time, I sit there and watch the show and see human nature in display. There is nothing more instructive than seeing the explosive actions of which is really just un-expended energy in display and demonstrating their motivations. Their motivations are so easily being exposed simply because they did not use their head to think. They have used their desire and other emotions to dictate their actions causing them to be utterly exposed into what will motivate them. When I know your bottom, I know how to price myself. Apparently, the price of many in reality is so low that it is really easy to get what they want.
And in reality, I am really their best friend rather than their main competitor. The very fact that they see me as their main competitor already exposed their position and that they have thrown their hat into the ring and would have name a price. To tease the ego abit, the would have to raise their exertions insofar to get their pot at the end of the rainbow. But eventually what they did was to approve every single action that I did that was to their interest and then insofar see who will put in the most effort and viola- either way she wins- simply because the option is on her end and not their's.
Hence even if she does not like the end product, she simply walk away with all the previous gains that have been accrued. How does one lose in such a bargain? Someone have to pay for all the option and at the end of the day, she can still reject it regardless of the price and effort. This means that throw in your money, and if I don't like you at the end of the day, I get to keep everything you give me and you get nothing. There is nothing you can do about it. You are paying for an option she can exercise- what logic is that?
Luckily, the commodity only runs for a good 10 years, until the person turns about 30 when the value really starts to drop and with each passing year, new faces with more fashionable exterior will come in and commanding more popularity hence, this value- or perceived value in many will really start deteriorating with each passing day literally.
Hence I have no idea why some guys view me with such vehemence when literally, I am just a tool played by woman- and in reality, I didn't even do anything- you did, or rather you think that I did.
Woman who like you will never lead you on- that is something I know for sure. Hence if you are led by the nose by some woman, you better ask yourself why. She doesn't like you at all- the choice is always yours.
That's why I know those that avoid you the most, are the one's who can't bear to see you the most. That's why, you must try the hardest- that's if the feeling is mutual- until when it is best to move on.
Be-early Valentine's Day.
I have nothing going on that is.
Nights
Eugene
In reality, I am already privy of what they want in their head, most of the time, I sit there and watch the show and see human nature in display. There is nothing more instructive than seeing the explosive actions of which is really just un-expended energy in display and demonstrating their motivations. Their motivations are so easily being exposed simply because they did not use their head to think. They have used their desire and other emotions to dictate their actions causing them to be utterly exposed into what will motivate them. When I know your bottom, I know how to price myself. Apparently, the price of many in reality is so low that it is really easy to get what they want.
And in reality, I am really their best friend rather than their main competitor. The very fact that they see me as their main competitor already exposed their position and that they have thrown their hat into the ring and would have name a price. To tease the ego abit, the would have to raise their exertions insofar to get their pot at the end of the rainbow. But eventually what they did was to approve every single action that I did that was to their interest and then insofar see who will put in the most effort and viola- either way she wins- simply because the option is on her end and not their's.
Hence even if she does not like the end product, she simply walk away with all the previous gains that have been accrued. How does one lose in such a bargain? Someone have to pay for all the option and at the end of the day, she can still reject it regardless of the price and effort. This means that throw in your money, and if I don't like you at the end of the day, I get to keep everything you give me and you get nothing. There is nothing you can do about it. You are paying for an option she can exercise- what logic is that?
Luckily, the commodity only runs for a good 10 years, until the person turns about 30 when the value really starts to drop and with each passing year, new faces with more fashionable exterior will come in and commanding more popularity hence, this value- or perceived value in many will really start deteriorating with each passing day literally.
Hence I have no idea why some guys view me with such vehemence when literally, I am just a tool played by woman- and in reality, I didn't even do anything- you did, or rather you think that I did.
Woman who like you will never lead you on- that is something I know for sure. Hence if you are led by the nose by some woman, you better ask yourself why. She doesn't like you at all- the choice is always yours.
That's why I know those that avoid you the most, are the one's who can't bear to see you the most. That's why, you must try the hardest- that's if the feeling is mutual- until when it is best to move on.
Be-early Valentine's Day.
I have nothing going on that is.
Nights
Eugene
Friday, February 08, 2013
The Youth
We are only young once-some might say. The funny thing that when I was younger, I have never thought that my youth was any of a commodity. But there are some whom will beg to differ. Your youth only stretches as far as when you are 30- anything after that, you are no longer fresh and juicy, you might be considered too tough for consumption or too bitter to be palatable. Hence to many, youth is highly prized.
The youth on the other hand do not know what they have. It is in their belief that being young, frivolous and demanding is their prerogative and believed that everything should be handed on a silver platter for them. Hence they have a tendency of placing themselves on the top shelf thinking that their value is unquestionable. Their value is unquestionable insofar that they are young- the value itself is fungible and decaying, hence sometimes I wonder where they have the confidence to have an attitude of indifference, a nonchalance which only comes when by inaction begets positive attributes. Insofar that as far as I am concerned, the value of youth is such that of youthful enthusiasm untainted by realistic constraints of life, energy which only comes from a hopeful attitude towards life, an innocence which is charming insofar that does not see the road ahead of you- a natural paternal and maternal instinct which is evoked by nostalgia. Beyond that, the value of youth is nothing more than energy and nostalgia.
I am able to observe this behaviour because I dress myself as nothing more than their equal and attempt to mingle with them like nothing more than their equal. The reaction is very often rather canny- the attitude of innocent nonchalance or a devilish impudence. They do not realised that they have been led to believed that they are extremely valuable but does not realised that their turn is coming up soon pretty soon in the next few years or they wish to levered on the physical differences and aim to extract the maximum value from it- not realising that the extraction is not that valuable considering that youth is literally everywhere.
For the former, they have put themselves so high up on the pedestal that they do not realized that they have been artificially held up by people much older than them- hence they have eyes so high that they believed that their value would last forever and when a few years later, they realised it is no longer true as there will always be younger people, the world would go crashing down on them.
For the latter, they do not realised that it is only when they are younger that people would want or care to teach you more things but when you chose the fastest or the easiest route- you literally lost the chance to gain experience from people around you. And when you are older, no one will teach you simply because you are expected to know.
It is a cultural belief for older men to go for younger women, they have legitimize this simply by convincing everyone around them- including the young women and themselves- that it is worth all the effort. The young women of course does not know that they are on a rotating door of younger women that's all- because they cannot see anything below them or did not look below them. The younger women believe that simply because the pedestal is so high such that the ordinary man cannot reached the same level- but really the only commodity she have is youth. She is simply too expensive for her peers- she is better off to be displayed at branded shop window- but she does not realised that her value is fungible, but she will, and plastic surgery will become her desperate measure. That to me is of little value- unless I am a tycoon looking for a arm candy or wall flower at home.
The latter on their hand cheapen themselves insofar to gain more resources faster. I might have been guilty of this- without realising it- but it is always best to withdraw when you are no longer able to sustain it. But ethically, I am clean as a whistle but there are other's whom want to get the shortcut to success without taking a risk. I took a risk, I know but for other's they want to bend the rules without putting themselves up for sale. It doesn't work that way. They want to get through life by offering themselves and thinking that the youth will get through the doors of success faster than anyone whom did not work for it. I worked for it, just faster; they did not work for it, but they want it faster and easier that's all. Hence the tactics employed is often that of emphasizing the age differences and benefits resulting from this age differences. I must say, some more experienced people still fall for that simply because it is easier to go along with that rather than suffer the agony of being teased at for being older and less physically mobile and also having to prevent oneself from being outside the "clique". But people never think, who benefits more being in the "clique", not you but them. This is "school" all over again, just that it is not geek or the fat boy but the old guy or spinster at the corner or at the corner office.
Having been through the first 30 years of my life, taking in the benefits of youth- I looked back and not with nostalgia but rather reflecting on the differences in the behaviour. My friends have graduated from this youthful period, they have married and become relatively successful but somehow I do not see them with much envy. But rather that, I suspect they can never let go of their youthful aspiration just because one reaches 30. One simply did not turn from hopeful to mature and experienced by a switch of a number, hence in their mind- and I have seen it with my own eyes as well- They are guilty of the perpetuating the above as much as they are of younger set taking advantage of it today. Why: I know the difference and I feel the difference- there is a difference- I mix with them, on the same level, context and playing field, and I can't get even relate to them. They didn't even try.
If I can feel the difference- and it is only a few years, what more of those older than me- or much older- you are responsible for the present state of matters as much as the youth are responsible for their "guilty" or "sinful" ways.
The youth on the other hand do not know what they have. It is in their belief that being young, frivolous and demanding is their prerogative and believed that everything should be handed on a silver platter for them. Hence they have a tendency of placing themselves on the top shelf thinking that their value is unquestionable. Their value is unquestionable insofar that they are young- the value itself is fungible and decaying, hence sometimes I wonder where they have the confidence to have an attitude of indifference, a nonchalance which only comes when by inaction begets positive attributes. Insofar that as far as I am concerned, the value of youth is such that of youthful enthusiasm untainted by realistic constraints of life, energy which only comes from a hopeful attitude towards life, an innocence which is charming insofar that does not see the road ahead of you- a natural paternal and maternal instinct which is evoked by nostalgia. Beyond that, the value of youth is nothing more than energy and nostalgia.
I am able to observe this behaviour because I dress myself as nothing more than their equal and attempt to mingle with them like nothing more than their equal. The reaction is very often rather canny- the attitude of innocent nonchalance or a devilish impudence. They do not realised that they have been led to believed that they are extremely valuable but does not realised that their turn is coming up soon pretty soon in the next few years or they wish to levered on the physical differences and aim to extract the maximum value from it- not realising that the extraction is not that valuable considering that youth is literally everywhere.
For the former, they have put themselves so high up on the pedestal that they do not realized that they have been artificially held up by people much older than them- hence they have eyes so high that they believed that their value would last forever and when a few years later, they realised it is no longer true as there will always be younger people, the world would go crashing down on them.
For the latter, they do not realised that it is only when they are younger that people would want or care to teach you more things but when you chose the fastest or the easiest route- you literally lost the chance to gain experience from people around you. And when you are older, no one will teach you simply because you are expected to know.
It is a cultural belief for older men to go for younger women, they have legitimize this simply by convincing everyone around them- including the young women and themselves- that it is worth all the effort. The young women of course does not know that they are on a rotating door of younger women that's all- because they cannot see anything below them or did not look below them. The younger women believe that simply because the pedestal is so high such that the ordinary man cannot reached the same level- but really the only commodity she have is youth. She is simply too expensive for her peers- she is better off to be displayed at branded shop window- but she does not realised that her value is fungible, but she will, and plastic surgery will become her desperate measure. That to me is of little value- unless I am a tycoon looking for a arm candy or wall flower at home.
The latter on their hand cheapen themselves insofar to gain more resources faster. I might have been guilty of this- without realising it- but it is always best to withdraw when you are no longer able to sustain it. But ethically, I am clean as a whistle but there are other's whom want to get the shortcut to success without taking a risk. I took a risk, I know but for other's they want to bend the rules without putting themselves up for sale. It doesn't work that way. They want to get through life by offering themselves and thinking that the youth will get through the doors of success faster than anyone whom did not work for it. I worked for it, just faster; they did not work for it, but they want it faster and easier that's all. Hence the tactics employed is often that of emphasizing the age differences and benefits resulting from this age differences. I must say, some more experienced people still fall for that simply because it is easier to go along with that rather than suffer the agony of being teased at for being older and less physically mobile and also having to prevent oneself from being outside the "clique". But people never think, who benefits more being in the "clique", not you but them. This is "school" all over again, just that it is not geek or the fat boy but the old guy or spinster at the corner or at the corner office.
Having been through the first 30 years of my life, taking in the benefits of youth- I looked back and not with nostalgia but rather reflecting on the differences in the behaviour. My friends have graduated from this youthful period, they have married and become relatively successful but somehow I do not see them with much envy. But rather that, I suspect they can never let go of their youthful aspiration just because one reaches 30. One simply did not turn from hopeful to mature and experienced by a switch of a number, hence in their mind- and I have seen it with my own eyes as well- They are guilty of the perpetuating the above as much as they are of younger set taking advantage of it today. Why: I know the difference and I feel the difference- there is a difference- I mix with them, on the same level, context and playing field, and I can't get even relate to them. They didn't even try.
If I can feel the difference- and it is only a few years, what more of those older than me- or much older- you are responsible for the present state of matters as much as the youth are responsible for their "guilty" or "sinful" ways.
Wednesday, February 06, 2013
Blame
There is a tendency for people to construct a reality of which to their particular advantage. When we walk into shopping malls, the architecture is such that it is created to maximize eyeballs and traffic into particular areas. Music are played to the effect that influence buying decisions. This works only if you have a particular outcome or objective in mind: of which perhaps is to maximize traffic flow or increase sales.
This on other hand, does not work if you do not know what you are going to do next or especially things that you are not able to quantify. The only effect that one would achieve from such structured patterns is such that the ultimate outcome is something quantifiable and not something experiential. Insofar, this is because, experiential in itself is not quantifiable.
Can you imagine going to a shopping mall- where it's only objective is say therefore to make everyone happy but does not really know how to measure it. Ultimately, what happen is that people would come into the shopping mall would come yes, but they will not leave and neither would they buy anything whatsoever- simply because being there makes them happy.
Hence when we attempt to circumvent reality of which to create decisions to our particular advantage, one must be clear of what one is trying to achieve. Rather than, haphazardly having one singular objective in mind, be it benign or malign, the ultimate outcome would always turn out to your disadvantage- simply because you paid too much effort into something that you don't even know what you want from it.
When you walk into embassy or imposing government institutions, the architecture on the other hand foreboding. The doors are small, and the structure is almost concrete in nature- and sometimes can be quite unfriendly. There is a sense of tension and security within the environment- this is to create a sense of safety and power onto the audience. Imagine, if one is attempting to build a shopping mall-like embassy, do you feel safe walking into your country's embassy and with "Lana Del Rey" playing in the background and people idling away at the cafe sitting for hours with their laptop. You would think someone is conducting a surveillance mission there.
Hence therefore, when we wish to circumscribe reality and especially one whereby someone is trying to create a decision to it's particular advantage, it is best to think of what one is trying to achieve rather than an unadulterated pursuit of one particular objective.
Therefore, one should not blame people for not buying from a shopping mall with an embassy-like architecture and silence as it's background noise. One should really reflect on one's incapability to manipulate mise-en-scene to it's best advantage rather than blame on the audience incapable to play ball with what is really just inept contextual construction.
Never blame the customer/audience, blame yourself for not understanding them.
Remember who is the active and passive actor: Why should the passive actor be compelled to be active in the first place. And you blame the passive actor for being actor- so do you blame the dog for being a dog?
This on other hand, does not work if you do not know what you are going to do next or especially things that you are not able to quantify. The only effect that one would achieve from such structured patterns is such that the ultimate outcome is something quantifiable and not something experiential. Insofar, this is because, experiential in itself is not quantifiable.
Can you imagine going to a shopping mall- where it's only objective is say therefore to make everyone happy but does not really know how to measure it. Ultimately, what happen is that people would come into the shopping mall would come yes, but they will not leave and neither would they buy anything whatsoever- simply because being there makes them happy.
Hence when we attempt to circumvent reality of which to create decisions to our particular advantage, one must be clear of what one is trying to achieve. Rather than, haphazardly having one singular objective in mind, be it benign or malign, the ultimate outcome would always turn out to your disadvantage- simply because you paid too much effort into something that you don't even know what you want from it.
When you walk into embassy or imposing government institutions, the architecture on the other hand foreboding. The doors are small, and the structure is almost concrete in nature- and sometimes can be quite unfriendly. There is a sense of tension and security within the environment- this is to create a sense of safety and power onto the audience. Imagine, if one is attempting to build a shopping mall-like embassy, do you feel safe walking into your country's embassy and with "Lana Del Rey" playing in the background and people idling away at the cafe sitting for hours with their laptop. You would think someone is conducting a surveillance mission there.
Hence therefore, when we wish to circumscribe reality and especially one whereby someone is trying to create a decision to it's particular advantage, it is best to think of what one is trying to achieve rather than an unadulterated pursuit of one particular objective.
Therefore, one should not blame people for not buying from a shopping mall with an embassy-like architecture and silence as it's background noise. One should really reflect on one's incapability to manipulate mise-en-scene to it's best advantage rather than blame on the audience incapable to play ball with what is really just inept contextual construction.
Never blame the customer/audience, blame yourself for not understanding them.
Remember who is the active and passive actor: Why should the passive actor be compelled to be active in the first place. And you blame the passive actor for being actor- so do you blame the dog for being a dog?
Monday, February 04, 2013
The Hole and the Images
A few years back I was watching this rather nondescript film called "The Hole". It's been quite a few years and so I might not be able to remember the exact storyline. But it was not about the storyline: it was actually about "the hole".
In the movie, a bunch of teenagers discovered a hole- "a bottomless pit" which seems to lead nowhere. And if I remember correctly, one of them actually fell into the "hole" and discovered all the fears that have been harbouring in the head and eventually manifested in the "hole" which came and haunt them.
The best part was that before dropping into the "hole", they put a video camera in and they saw the images of a: "one eye monster". But when they actually fell into it, it was actually a bottomless pit filled with their own personal demons.
The "hole" was not a gateway to hell, it was your personal "hole"- your little "lack" of which you constantly strive to compensate your whole entire life. Your personality was built around this "little" hole. The bigger the hole, the larger the compensation. There is an adage to the "empty vessel making the most noise"- and this is form of which crystallizes your own personal psychological state.
I have recently noticed the insecurity of many men. The post-industrial age means that strength and other forms of archaic skills are no longer relevant- and insofar then masculinity are tied to these images of times of which the hunter-gatherer, the knight, the steel mill worker dominate the popular landscape. Today's men are so confused that they jumped onto any fad of which to justify their manhood.
The images of Western cowboy, gun slinging in the wild Wild West and with Marlboro cigarette still dominates the modern landscape. In place of western cowboy is the rebel without a cause, James Dean and in today's age, these images continues to stick in popular culture, trying to demonstrate unbridled masculinity in face of the cigarette being the anti-thesis of healthy living and living a life long enough to show your real manhood. The cigarette is the little hole called the manhood of which everyone attempts to find the justification for their differentiation from "La Femme".
In the movie, the image of scarred childhood dominated by a violent father haunt one of the characters, in popular images, it is the fear of the "La Femme" which defines one masculinity. It is not the violent father but rather, the fear of being obselete which haunts the modern man. Definitively male products is defined as aggressive lines but not practicable in real life. One can say that the interest which separates our division of labour previously is no longer congruent with popular values.
Therefore nostalgia and fantasy have us believed that we can have what we want and eat it as well. James Dean died before he reached 30, there was a recent show called "Cowboys versus Aliens" and that really sums it all up.
But lest we become obsessed with proving our manhood, rest assured that history have shown that are these popular images of "unbridled masculinity" is really just popular "images" of history. For every hunter, there will be a person which sharpen the tools and the scout, for every knight, there are hundreds of pike man, for every steel worker, there are always factory and assembly line workers. In this modern age, the sportsman, the banker, the Internet entrepreneur, there are also thousands more that slogged every single day hoping to climb the rat race.
The rites of passages which defined the coming of age of yester years are nothing more than glamorized version of the progress of human culture and civilization which quite conveniently forgot about all the little people that made it possible for the world to tick today. These are snapshots of the past and not the reality. Your crisis that you faced now, is the same one that they faced 10,000 years ago, 2,000 years, 1,000 years ago, 100 years and yesterday. 100 years from now, the sportsman, the banker and the Internet entrepreneur will be nothing more than today's knight. No one actually believes them. And no, no one wants to live in that age anyway.
Hence, in today's winner's take all world, any way to differentiate oneself without really putting that much of an effort is really just a way of showing a difference without really adding value to yourself. The cigarette, the car and even the androgynous look have proven to be shortcuts of which is nothing to demonstrate the biological difference which translates into essential differences- which of course is expected to translate into tangible and material benefits. But if you think a little harder, really?
Hence, everyone really have a "hole", before you dropped into it, you will catch the glimpse of that "one eye monster", and when you dropped into it, you normally never like what you see and your video camera is really the crutch to avoid dropping into the hole- thinking that one can actually benefit without being curious and standing at sidelines looking in. You want to see what is inside, but you never see it until you confront it.
Buy yourself a camera and all you ever see is images.
Hence the strategy of many people is very simple. They never would want to jump into the little hole of their own but rather other's take the jump and transmit the images but unfortunately, all they would ever see is the eye one monster. Hence they fear the hole even more than before they first knew about it. This is the crux therefore of all envy, jealousy and latent rage. Everyone thinks that they have won but really all they ever saw is the one eye monster everyone else also see.
No one can have the cake and eat it as well.
Have you ever realised that not once did I ever mentioned about the materiality of the circumstances- it was never about me, it was always about you. In similar terms, have I said anything about you as well. Have i portray my friend, the person sitting next to me or anyone as a personal demon? It's your personal hole, and not mine. The little girl that crawl out of the hole in the second trailer and the little clown is your little nightmare that led you scrambling from door to door- closing one after another. No one closed the door, you did it to yourself because only the little boy saw it and the teenager saw it- no one did.
What about competition/comparing, about right/wrong, early/late, brighter/duller, about virtual/and real, about authentic/plastic, about passion/interest. Not once did I alluded to that. They are material because you saw the girl climbed out of the hole. You were scared- you did not know what was that.
Take care.
Have a drink and lie down.
In the movie, a bunch of teenagers discovered a hole- "a bottomless pit" which seems to lead nowhere. And if I remember correctly, one of them actually fell into the "hole" and discovered all the fears that have been harbouring in the head and eventually manifested in the "hole" which came and haunt them.
The best part was that before dropping into the "hole", they put a video camera in and they saw the images of a: "one eye monster". But when they actually fell into it, it was actually a bottomless pit filled with their own personal demons.
The "hole" was not a gateway to hell, it was your personal "hole"- your little "lack" of which you constantly strive to compensate your whole entire life. Your personality was built around this "little" hole. The bigger the hole, the larger the compensation. There is an adage to the "empty vessel making the most noise"- and this is form of which crystallizes your own personal psychological state.
I have recently noticed the insecurity of many men. The post-industrial age means that strength and other forms of archaic skills are no longer relevant- and insofar then masculinity are tied to these images of times of which the hunter-gatherer, the knight, the steel mill worker dominate the popular landscape. Today's men are so confused that they jumped onto any fad of which to justify their manhood.
The images of Western cowboy, gun slinging in the wild Wild West and with Marlboro cigarette still dominates the modern landscape. In place of western cowboy is the rebel without a cause, James Dean and in today's age, these images continues to stick in popular culture, trying to demonstrate unbridled masculinity in face of the cigarette being the anti-thesis of healthy living and living a life long enough to show your real manhood. The cigarette is the little hole called the manhood of which everyone attempts to find the justification for their differentiation from "La Femme".
In the movie, the image of scarred childhood dominated by a violent father haunt one of the characters, in popular images, it is the fear of the "La Femme" which defines one masculinity. It is not the violent father but rather, the fear of being obselete which haunts the modern man. Definitively male products is defined as aggressive lines but not practicable in real life. One can say that the interest which separates our division of labour previously is no longer congruent with popular values.
Therefore nostalgia and fantasy have us believed that we can have what we want and eat it as well. James Dean died before he reached 30, there was a recent show called "Cowboys versus Aliens" and that really sums it all up.
But lest we become obsessed with proving our manhood, rest assured that history have shown that are these popular images of "unbridled masculinity" is really just popular "images" of history. For every hunter, there will be a person which sharpen the tools and the scout, for every knight, there are hundreds of pike man, for every steel worker, there are always factory and assembly line workers. In this modern age, the sportsman, the banker, the Internet entrepreneur, there are also thousands more that slogged every single day hoping to climb the rat race.
The rites of passages which defined the coming of age of yester years are nothing more than glamorized version of the progress of human culture and civilization which quite conveniently forgot about all the little people that made it possible for the world to tick today. These are snapshots of the past and not the reality. Your crisis that you faced now, is the same one that they faced 10,000 years ago, 2,000 years, 1,000 years ago, 100 years and yesterday. 100 years from now, the sportsman, the banker and the Internet entrepreneur will be nothing more than today's knight. No one actually believes them. And no, no one wants to live in that age anyway.
Hence, in today's winner's take all world, any way to differentiate oneself without really putting that much of an effort is really just a way of showing a difference without really adding value to yourself. The cigarette, the car and even the androgynous look have proven to be shortcuts of which is nothing to demonstrate the biological difference which translates into essential differences- which of course is expected to translate into tangible and material benefits. But if you think a little harder, really?
Hence, everyone really have a "hole", before you dropped into it, you will catch the glimpse of that "one eye monster", and when you dropped into it, you normally never like what you see and your video camera is really the crutch to avoid dropping into the hole- thinking that one can actually benefit without being curious and standing at sidelines looking in. You want to see what is inside, but you never see it until you confront it.
Buy yourself a camera and all you ever see is images.
Hence the strategy of many people is very simple. They never would want to jump into the little hole of their own but rather other's take the jump and transmit the images but unfortunately, all they would ever see is the eye one monster. Hence they fear the hole even more than before they first knew about it. This is the crux therefore of all envy, jealousy and latent rage. Everyone thinks that they have won but really all they ever saw is the one eye monster everyone else also see.
No one can have the cake and eat it as well.
Have you ever realised that not once did I ever mentioned about the materiality of the circumstances- it was never about me, it was always about you. In similar terms, have I said anything about you as well. Have i portray my friend, the person sitting next to me or anyone as a personal demon? It's your personal hole, and not mine. The little girl that crawl out of the hole in the second trailer and the little clown is your little nightmare that led you scrambling from door to door- closing one after another. No one closed the door, you did it to yourself because only the little boy saw it and the teenager saw it- no one did.
What about competition/comparing, about right/wrong, early/late, brighter/duller, about virtual/and real, about authentic/plastic, about passion/interest. Not once did I alluded to that. They are material because you saw the girl climbed out of the hole. You were scared- you did not know what was that.
Take care.
Have a drink and lie down.
Sunday, February 03, 2013
What are you made off?
Have anyone taken a roller coaster? Have you been to those run of the mill type of roller coaster where they just basically swing you wildly and that's about it- and you have never visited those at Universal Studios- and then they tell you that this is as good as it get. You had a good time and you never question because whether there are better roller coaster out there- because well, you really had a good time.
One day, you sat on this roller coaster that no one has ever sat before and it was a ride that was so exhilarating that when you go back to your common roller coaster, you really felt short changed. When everyone tries to convince you that this roller coaster that we have here is the best, and then you screamed to their head, it is not true then, all other experiences must be compared with that one roller coaster ride isn't it.
Cynicism's is not bred from apathy, it is bred from seeing other's from inside out which one can relate to. It has nothing to do with being tired or experienced or just condescending.
It is precisely because we have seen what life can bring that we see the futility of the life of many other's. On the other hand, we do not despise the way that other's live but rather empathize with the quality of the life that they have lived.
Many have mistaken life is enjoyment and moralizing is simply a hindrance on the guilty pleasures that life can bring. Trust me, you can take that same roller coaster ride every single day and enjoy that moment as often as you like and that I would still tell you the same thing. It is not because I am not convinced, it is just that if life is only about experience than let me tell you- there is always better ones out there. You can stand in your roller coaster and laughed all those scared little people afraid to take this thrill but I can tell you that it is not about sitting in that roller coaster that matters.
But it is about walking to the roller coaster when you are scared that matters. It is not about banning all roller coasters because it disrupts productive life but rather about how you walk up to circus master and tell him to stop. It never did involved any roller coaster in the first place.
I have seen many a people who have stood on roller coaster and laughed at the cowardice of everyone else. I have seen people standing outside the circus and protesting against their existence. But most of all I have seen the most is that of people looking at the ruckus caused and just watched. That is apathy.
Many people have mistaken quality of life with enjoyment of life. Many have swing so much to either end that they think decadence is the one way and another believes that living a moral right is the right way. Either way requires you to look at life straight in the eye and tell it what you want to do. The other way would be to just look away and pretend that someone knows it better than yourself what is life about.
Not everyone can be a star on a big stage but everyone can be a star of their own life- that much is pretty clear. Living vicariously through another person, entity or abstract concept just means that you allow someone else to take over your life. But are you ready for that yourself in the first place?
I'll leave it to you to decide.
Eugene
One day, you sat on this roller coaster that no one has ever sat before and it was a ride that was so exhilarating that when you go back to your common roller coaster, you really felt short changed. When everyone tries to convince you that this roller coaster that we have here is the best, and then you screamed to their head, it is not true then, all other experiences must be compared with that one roller coaster ride isn't it.
Cynicism's is not bred from apathy, it is bred from seeing other's from inside out which one can relate to. It has nothing to do with being tired or experienced or just condescending.
It is precisely because we have seen what life can bring that we see the futility of the life of many other's. On the other hand, we do not despise the way that other's live but rather empathize with the quality of the life that they have lived.
Many have mistaken life is enjoyment and moralizing is simply a hindrance on the guilty pleasures that life can bring. Trust me, you can take that same roller coaster ride every single day and enjoy that moment as often as you like and that I would still tell you the same thing. It is not because I am not convinced, it is just that if life is only about experience than let me tell you- there is always better ones out there. You can stand in your roller coaster and laughed all those scared little people afraid to take this thrill but I can tell you that it is not about sitting in that roller coaster that matters.
But it is about walking to the roller coaster when you are scared that matters. It is not about banning all roller coasters because it disrupts productive life but rather about how you walk up to circus master and tell him to stop. It never did involved any roller coaster in the first place.
I have seen many a people who have stood on roller coaster and laughed at the cowardice of everyone else. I have seen people standing outside the circus and protesting against their existence. But most of all I have seen the most is that of people looking at the ruckus caused and just watched. That is apathy.
Many people have mistaken quality of life with enjoyment of life. Many have swing so much to either end that they think decadence is the one way and another believes that living a moral right is the right way. Either way requires you to look at life straight in the eye and tell it what you want to do. The other way would be to just look away and pretend that someone knows it better than yourself what is life about.
Not everyone can be a star on a big stage but everyone can be a star of their own life- that much is pretty clear. Living vicariously through another person, entity or abstract concept just means that you allow someone else to take over your life. But are you ready for that yourself in the first place?
I'll leave it to you to decide.
Eugene
Saturday, February 02, 2013
My Boogie
How do you define as a social relationship. For some, it is seen as a gainful social interaction of which is characterized by a cordial engagement. This means that all social interaction is formalized by the very fact that one must have direct verbal conversation to consider as a typical social interaction.
Hence then insofar perhaps, Micheal Jackson must be the most social person since his words are heard by millions and billions of people but where the opposite party is not heard at all. Social interaction is not just defined by this particular manner. Any form of action of which derives a social function of which to communicate a certain message in any way is consider a proper social interaction.
Hence when one act in opposite reaction of which is expected and insofar that he/she is trying to tell me something- be it hostile or otherwise- is consider a social interaction.
In recent times, I have began to realise that everywhere I go, everyone is trying to tell me something. It is like everyone single moment, everyone is screaming into my ear and grabbing my eyeballs and telling me that come and look me and hear what I have to say. I never get bored of this silent communication of which sometimes I honestly find it rather amusing.
Sometimes, I almost feel the world knows me better than I know myself. It is like trying to anticipate my every single thought and every single move. Everyone is my friend and my enemy all at the same time. I feel like I am Mark Zuckerburg with friends everywhere I go of which knows everything about me but I nothing about them.
Things always happen around me for some apparent reason- and I consider this as one of the most social activities in this world. Can you imagine being known without needing to introduce yourself and for some apparent reason, even when no red carpet is being rolled, it never ceases to amaze the extend of which developments unfold of which to capture my emotional salience. This require more effort than treating me like a star.
You ask me whether I have friends, I have friends everywhere, I make interactions every single minute of my life. Initially, it feels like it is extremely intrusive to my privacy but I began to see that the amount of effort everyone puts in to instill a level of emotional salience- be it benign or malign- is almost flattering. Can you imagine being the centre of the focus all the time without trying.
If all actions are couched towards advocating a certain emotional reaction, insofar then I consider this as a social interaction- why: because it is trying to tell me something, because you are "talking" to me- even though half the time I don't know what you are trying to drive at.
Sometimes, I think the world knows me better than I know myself. It is trying to warn me about things, trying to morally guide me and of course also get angry at me. If these emotions are not social, then what is: it is me who is anti-social whom is quite incapable of agreeing with them or replying them back. Therefore, I like to apologize to the world for all the time and effort into impressing upon me the existence of my inner most fears and desires and me not able to acknowledging them all of them. It is really a shame the amount of fruitful intentions into communication that insofar that I am quite incapable of acknowledging every single one of them.
The biggest form of flattery is always imitation- be it to impress or to frustrate. Although, I get irritated when people imitate or follow my every single move- I must say that it must have hit a raw nerve inside of them to really remember the minute nuances of my actions. My little muscle spasm or my nonchalant swipe at boogie in sometimes not so private areas. I really thank you for all the gentle reminders of which much effort must have been laid to impress upon me my most gentle actions is under tight scrutiny. You must really hate or loved me for making all these arrangements insofar to remind me of my unfounded insecurities.
I would like to say I am extremely insecure about exposing my most private moments of which to show my most vulnerable sides. Everything that is arranged to hit a raw nerve, really did hit a raw nerve.
Hence in response to the overwhelming demand of which to hit my most vulnerable areas and weakest spot, I would like to congratulate you that you have succeeded and I feel extremely insecure about showing my ugly and unsavoury side and at the same extremely guilty to succumb to human sins of which it seems only I should be impervious to. Trust me, I really do hear you and feel for you and feel your efforts. It really hurts so bad that I find it difficult to express in words.
Everyone is so nice to me and so cordial to me and at the same so socially inviting to me- even though I would have to expand the definition a little- that I feel terrible for not responding in kind.
Therefore I would like to take this moment to express my gratitude towards me for showering me with so much time, effort, coordination, patience and communication- and all other qualities- of which to remind me that I have no privacy that I feel you and I just like to say that: The pleasure is all mine.
P/S: A big boogie just came from out my nose. It is extremely satisfying to say the least.
Cheers
Eugene
Hence then insofar perhaps, Micheal Jackson must be the most social person since his words are heard by millions and billions of people but where the opposite party is not heard at all. Social interaction is not just defined by this particular manner. Any form of action of which derives a social function of which to communicate a certain message in any way is consider a proper social interaction.
Hence when one act in opposite reaction of which is expected and insofar that he/she is trying to tell me something- be it hostile or otherwise- is consider a social interaction.
In recent times, I have began to realise that everywhere I go, everyone is trying to tell me something. It is like everyone single moment, everyone is screaming into my ear and grabbing my eyeballs and telling me that come and look me and hear what I have to say. I never get bored of this silent communication of which sometimes I honestly find it rather amusing.
Sometimes, I almost feel the world knows me better than I know myself. It is like trying to anticipate my every single thought and every single move. Everyone is my friend and my enemy all at the same time. I feel like I am Mark Zuckerburg with friends everywhere I go of which knows everything about me but I nothing about them.
Things always happen around me for some apparent reason- and I consider this as one of the most social activities in this world. Can you imagine being known without needing to introduce yourself and for some apparent reason, even when no red carpet is being rolled, it never ceases to amaze the extend of which developments unfold of which to capture my emotional salience. This require more effort than treating me like a star.
You ask me whether I have friends, I have friends everywhere, I make interactions every single minute of my life. Initially, it feels like it is extremely intrusive to my privacy but I began to see that the amount of effort everyone puts in to instill a level of emotional salience- be it benign or malign- is almost flattering. Can you imagine being the centre of the focus all the time without trying.
If all actions are couched towards advocating a certain emotional reaction, insofar then I consider this as a social interaction- why: because it is trying to tell me something, because you are "talking" to me- even though half the time I don't know what you are trying to drive at.
Sometimes, I think the world knows me better than I know myself. It is trying to warn me about things, trying to morally guide me and of course also get angry at me. If these emotions are not social, then what is: it is me who is anti-social whom is quite incapable of agreeing with them or replying them back. Therefore, I like to apologize to the world for all the time and effort into impressing upon me the existence of my inner most fears and desires and me not able to acknowledging them all of them. It is really a shame the amount of fruitful intentions into communication that insofar that I am quite incapable of acknowledging every single one of them.
The biggest form of flattery is always imitation- be it to impress or to frustrate. Although, I get irritated when people imitate or follow my every single move- I must say that it must have hit a raw nerve inside of them to really remember the minute nuances of my actions. My little muscle spasm or my nonchalant swipe at boogie in sometimes not so private areas. I really thank you for all the gentle reminders of which much effort must have been laid to impress upon me my most gentle actions is under tight scrutiny. You must really hate or loved me for making all these arrangements insofar to remind me of my unfounded insecurities.
I would like to say I am extremely insecure about exposing my most private moments of which to show my most vulnerable sides. Everything that is arranged to hit a raw nerve, really did hit a raw nerve.
Hence in response to the overwhelming demand of which to hit my most vulnerable areas and weakest spot, I would like to congratulate you that you have succeeded and I feel extremely insecure about showing my ugly and unsavoury side and at the same extremely guilty to succumb to human sins of which it seems only I should be impervious to. Trust me, I really do hear you and feel for you and feel your efforts. It really hurts so bad that I find it difficult to express in words.
Everyone is so nice to me and so cordial to me and at the same so socially inviting to me- even though I would have to expand the definition a little- that I feel terrible for not responding in kind.
Therefore I would like to take this moment to express my gratitude towards me for showering me with so much time, effort, coordination, patience and communication- and all other qualities- of which to remind me that I have no privacy that I feel you and I just like to say that: The pleasure is all mine.
P/S: A big boogie just came from out my nose. It is extremely satisfying to say the least.
Cheers
Eugene
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