Romantic Asia

I do not know how to write clearly and succinctly without trying to outshine anyone or appear to be smart.

The point of communication was always 1) the job 2) the salience. 1) the job refers to communicating a point and deliver the message 2) the salience- was to hit the meaning spot on, so that the message would sink in and not just bubble on the surface- and that means  carrying an emotional and social/reciprocity content so to speak.

And this has been the pain of a person schooled in science and rationality but taught in ways of respect and human bondage. At home, we are taught to be grateful, respectful and understanding but in school and at work, we are expected to be performing and outstanding.

And at the same time, we grappled with human loyalties and yet maintaining an even keel on issues. We no longer lived in a world on our own- there are filters but they are huge and porous.

Secondly, without appearing to be really smart, I have notice one very single thing that some Westerners have a romanticized version of Asian culture while some Asians themselves have a strong identity about themselves.

It would indeed be extremely erroneous to think in such dichotomous terms as well because ultimately it would I think subconsciously formed a "me vs them" mentality. It would without anyone realising it that we have in our head prepare for a conflict in our head.

And speaking from this particular juncture, it is even harder for anyone whom is Chinese and Asian who works in Western style market place, products and to communicate in western style concepts and yet able to connect to the world where respect and understanding is paramount.

It is ultimately very difficult to communicate to someone and telling them about counter party risk, interest rate risk and equity premium risk without sounding disrespectful, money-minded and Mr know-it-all.

Indeed, I know some of friends, colleagues and family might not be happy in me for saying in this: when I say some Westerners have a romanticized version of Asian culture because they are not accessible to the so-called " not-so-nice" side of it all.

Asians will protect themselves and their turf at all cost. If you are outsider, then you would remain as one. You have no way of redeeming yourself except for asking for their forgiveness.

And when I mean you are outsider, they don't tell you are one- they would entirely justified in doing whatever they want to you- because you are outsider- and unless you asked for their forgiveness, there is really no limit they can push you,death, bankruptcy and suicide is not off-limits. Once you are inside, there is an order and only when someone above you did wrong, there is no way you can move up.

And when inside, there are insiders and outsiders as well- and when you are an outsider within it- there are many ways of helping you along with mistakes. It is really survivor of the fittest- Asian style. And yes, there is human relations and bondage- but it only goes so far as there are really no mistakes.

And some people might not like to hear what I would say- as I have personal experience of it before. I maybe Chinese and Asian- and I might have only Chinese girlfriends- it still doesn't qualify me as an insider within an inside circle as I do not strongly defend my so-called Asian heritage.

I do not hide along with everyone and would normally try to communicate and go to get what I want as compared with some of my peers who believed in working unerringly and quietly while waiting for the older and more respected seniors to give the rewards. The thing about Asians is that they would not grudgingly let you grab the limelight- once you are off the stage, motions are in place already to disadvantaged you or helped you along with the mistakes- that's your "punishment" for pushing your way up the line.

It would appear that there seems to be sticks and no carrots but those in the inner circle always play the ones outside it. The carrots are in these people who are outside this circle- it would be indeed justifiable to screw around with them and cream off their efforts because they are not "family" or in the "inner circle".

To the outsider or the western style critic- this would be nepotism, cronyism and to the Asian romantic, this is the idea of cultural norms and reciprocity. And unless, you are within the system, it is not as simple as criticizing or embracing  it. The thing about Asian culture is that once you are out, you are out- attacking or loving it would not make a difference.

And at the same time, I always strive for effectiveness and excellence- and to some this are western style ideas, we should pride teamwork instead; and to other's in local slang- be "smart", and " don't try to out-smart everyone".

I can safely tell you that the above is true because I am an Asian Chinese schooled in western ways and lived among Asian families and culture. To the Westerner who might be reading this, you should be thankful that you are not a "yellow banana"- yellow outside and white inside-, and to the Asian especially Chinese, who might be reading this, be careful to watch over your shoulder because reading this has already cast you slowly out of the inner circle.

I always thought attending schools and attaining a degree would be at least a ticket to a comfortable life but when I strived harder and pushing harder a little later in life, it occurred to me that my place was already set when I was growing up and earlier in my life. And that is the Asian system for you.