I am not working now. Some say that I should be depressed that a 32 year old graduate cannot find a job for two years and was being removed twice from the last two jobs. In truth, I am not. The point is that there are some people whom deemed better than me insofar that they in the belief that they are a better person or in a higher moral ground than I am and hence should and more suitable for the position. It would be true if I am electing for the job of a pastor or a nun.
The problem really lies I realize with women. I have no issues with men because in most cases, I am really more capable than me and they readily agree with me. But the point of it all is that women always sees me and still see me as a threat even when I am not working. I almost find it amazing.
Recently, I went for an interview as an Art Gallery Assistant. I met three young female art students whom are also competing for the job and me- as a Finance student with at least a decade my junior impress upon me that I am more suitable for the job. This means that I have no business being there. I have went for a lot of interviews before this and of course I will be more proficient in the job interview and I might even be more suitable for the job simply because I will probably sell better than some arty farty students.
In another incident, some male colleagues of mine constantly remind me that my female colleagues is always trying to snatch my visibility and limelight away from the bosses or those in the circle. They constantly claimed that they used the sexual diversion technique to divert my attention away and that of these men in power from the issue at hand and onto themselves. This is really nothing more than sex sells. Sometimes, I am guilty of it- I sells the best to aunties.
My grub is that these female colleagues always used my line and feign ignorance, they always pretend nothing will happen to them simply because they are women and I will not compete with them. This I have a beef with them and I have more than make known to my management many a times. They have this gender equality mentality and the best part is the used men- by telling them about my techniques and aligning their interest with theirs. Hence if I were to complain, I would be ungentlemanly. They sometimes think that I am an idiot.
Sometimes, it is so painfully obvious that everything comes back to me that no matter what they do, nothing will ever happen for them. This means that even if they were to do above, the point is that what is the cause of everything. Me- and even if I am narcissistic here, it is really so painfully obvious.
I recently went for post graduate studies in Finance and it has become really obvious to everyone that people simply believed that just because of this, I have offended a lot of mediocre people and therefore I am not fit for the job. I have no idea where this type of harebrained idea came from. A Finance post graduate bachelor with a stellar 3 years coupled with management conflict is NOT a bad thing. This is green card for everything. [ albeit I did not write the reasons for leaving in full black and white]
Perhaps, the market has depressed itself into a point of accepting post graduate students for a dime. But the point is not that I am not accepting market practices, the point is that some people want cheap, good and easily mouldable people and I am not one of them. I am already moulded, and changing me would be hard, I am not as cheap as when I just graduated and I am definitely not good- since I am willing to take on management several times.
Have a quiet thought and think about what my life is really made of. You will realize that depression is really my antidote and not poison.
Thursday, December 19, 2013
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