Shabby

Before I was labelled "weird" and "different" by everyone, I actually have an active social life and I have girlfriends but I am not committed type and so most didn't materialize to anything serious- but I did consider buying a ring once, but the girl dump me that day, but we got back again, and I never got around buying the ring. But I digress.

Anyway, the point is that I really do not see what girls see in guys nowadays. They look like they just come out of dog house and they look like they just step out of bed. This dishevelled look is not very attractive if you don't have nice tousled hair and strong jawline- you simply look like you are ready to walk into the wet market.

I am not nice looking, I am not even above average looking, I am just average looking at best. But I don't think it is the looks, it is simply not respecting whom you are with that's all. Look if you watch all those films about dishevelled dorm rooms, smoking on balcony and high fives among room mates and binge drinking during your university days look very fun and very nice looking. Hello, they are actors and actresses which are handpicked simply to look good even if they wake up. Walking around in your track pants and your bermudas and oversized hall t-shirt might look like you are living the life above, I can safely tell you that no, you don't like those college films. You like you just step out of your bed.

Those tousled hair look sexy on these hunky actors because they can pull it off- but if you have floppy hair that covers your forehead which requires you constantly stroke it off from your eye simply just look shabby and not "shabby" fashionable- like those college films with tight t-shirt and unshaven face.

Hence, I really do not see how does this appeal to any girl. This might appeal to her when you are in the same school and you get to see each other everyday and it is better to mix with people whom you are familiar with then to break the mould- but I can tell you that you will lose her immediately once she starts working. [oops- I digress again]

Women have make-up, men have nothing besides personal bearing and if you think you looking dirty, and shabby is your personal look. Wow, you will forever be chasing silly school girls forever.
And personal bearing need time to cultivate- women can fake it until they acquire it from make-up but men do not have that luxury. If you dress like you are going to the we market every day, you will wear like you are working for the wet market when you go to work.

I am not trying to split couples up and no I do not think that I am better than them but when I see guys never growing up, I can almost see what is going to happen later- either they will get knocked up because they cannot get out of the house or when they start seeing the world, someone is going to get hurt.

The thing is that they are very proud of this too- and they wear it like a scar on the battlefield- and that is worrying. It is like their self-image is revolve around being shabby, dirty and lowly. The lack of shame and self awareness is really quite disturbing. I mean if I wear like I just came out of bed, I will try to be self- effacing even if it is because of circumstances but I think if you are shout at the top of your voice, how low you are without feeling a sense of guilt, I worry for you. Your self-image and self esteem is really damaged and pathological.

Let me put it out to you- the working class or let's say the weak do not announce to other's how exploited or helpless they are- they are not proud of it and they are simply wish for better outcome but is not helped by circumstances. But the above is telling themselves how low they are, they have already given up without even a tinge of sadness or guilt.

I was at bookstore today and I just scolded a young couple for making a ruckus and telling everyone their personal and private lives. Look I can hear you and no, I am not interested in your story. It was not a story about what to have for dinner and yes, they were dress shabbily and apparently doesn't care about what other's think. And they have a cheek to actually answer back that it is a book store- and of course I sarcastically tell them there is a café downstairs. It is a book store for reading and not a café for chit chatting- if you don't understand simple social rules like keeping decibels in a bookstore to a comfortable level, you must see yourself as nothing more than a nuisance. Wow, they were aggressive too and I have told off a young kid in train to watch where he is going and he is actually don't even see his mistake and of course, I offer to shook his hand when simply walking away would save him some embarrassment.

I am not afraid to speak to strangers and put them in their place- and no I do not do tangentially like making fun of them. I will walk up to them and tell them you are making a ruckus- especially if you have stepped into my personal space. I do not care if I cannot hear you or if you make strange gestures to make me look bad- but if I can hear it or you step into my personal space. I will make sure that you know my intention.

You know I am not gangster and there are no mafia in Singapore, just street corner gangs- and trust me, the places I go are not places that they go hence we do not have any conflict. It is these little heads with egos placed in the sand that have no communication skills or low self-esteem that makes the loudest noise. By the way, even the street corner gangs don't hide the fact that they are ruffians, but you are kids trying to act like ruffians- hence watch the environment.

I would prefer the street corner gangster anytime than the poly kid who watch too many gangster movies.

[ My NS men were gangsters and they have 4 year old kids at 18: they actually invite me to their "mom's" massage parlour and I suggest that you give me a wide berth if you have nothing better to do]