Proportionality

You know that people cannot accept a much better anything- when they start to use intimidation and some form of fear inducing activities. The funny thing about all of these is that, the fear is not the result of the activity but rather the cause of why people have to engage in such behaviour in the first place.

There are often two type responses resulting from fear inducing activities 1) an overkill 2) discrimination. When you start to fear, you tend to over-allocate resources just to beat off the opposition and if this fails, it then becomes ideological- this means that everything is false, only what you say truth.

You see, on paper, it is quite obvious that my paper and resume is obviously way better than what most employers actually expect but I once have an employer attempt to undercut me to the point that just because I need a position, I would capitulate and give in to the demands. Once while studying, I decided to take up a part time job. I just want to get some cash and really didn't want to oversell myself. I only say that I am studying full time and I only wanted a part time position that's all. I quoted what was almost standard part time effectively what was not graduate pay. The next day, they went to post on the job ads asking for 20% less. I never contacted them again.

The only day I was just asking for an entry position, and I just went to ask about the head hunter about what the position- she went to tell me about a cock and bull story about that the market is looking for senior position. They were not even answering my question. I didn't ask about the market, I was asking about what happen to the position I was talking about. I never replied the email.

The other day, I was walking around the mall and I was sort trying to rationalize some decisions in my head and sort of pass time, write small little notes in my phone- this become an analogy that I was mad, different and weird. I began to think that why would anyone bother whether I wrote notes in my phone or basically I was trying to work out things in my head.

You see, I was minding my own business and writing my own notes, what has got to do with anything doing some shopping coming from different parts of Singapore coming to town area to do their shopping. I thought if they came all the way to shopping strip, they should be shopping or at least window shopping- what has got to do with strangers also browsing around.

I really do not know what they are afraid of- an absolute overkill or absolute intimidating tactic. If you want to get that part of the shelf, a simple excuse me or don't mind would suffice. There isn't even a need to put an elaborate show that to get to that part of the shelf, what most one do the most drastic thing just to get the other side of the river.

And with regards to negotiation, if you really want a person to work for you and want a good deal, the last thing you want to scare the living daylights of another person simply by undercutting so much that it leaves them no choice but to take up the offer. I was not scared of not finding job because I went to the interview, I was there to find a part time job and not to sell myself for abit more money.

And in this case, if you did not do a good job or am not able to offer appropriate alternative for a situation that you did not foresee, the worst thing that one can do is offer an overkill of a situation which means bringing out the whole world to explain the situation. When someone ask you a question, you answer it and then give an explanation. Don't intimidate a person to avoid answering question. Anyway, I never did contact the recruiter again- it is obvious she is out of her depth.

I do not know how to impress upon anyone that I do not really give a damn how you arrive at this situation. When someone ask you a question or give you a proposition, you give an answer back proportional to the question and not to undersell the situation- which is the first and overkill the situation which is the second. In the last, create a drama quite unnecessary to the point of the situation.

Sometimes, I am not even asking for the world to show any favour, I am asking a question and all I need is answer to the best of your knowledge and then we can move on from the situation. There isn't a need to under-whelm or over-whelm the whole situation or even create unnecessary distraction because most of the time, I don't really give a damn at all.

No, I am not going to get angry for undercutting neither am I going to be frustrated for being given a roundabout and lastly I am not going to confront your making ridiculous claims. I simply delete the email and then not work with you again. Alternatively, I will just take that since I am given so much space- I will just simply take advantage of it.

I do not intend to curry any favours and neither do you expect any favours any more or less from your own personal actions. It is simply social reciprocity or even pro quid quo. All human relationships is built on this basis. There isn't any human relationships- be it social or working ones- that will work beyond this.

Unless, you are a personal muse and you will have disproportional amount of attention but proportional to the amount of inspiration- there isn't a need to show anymore extra attention beyond practical ones.

If I need to do 20 task in a day and everyone wants to be the personal muse, I would get nothing done at all. I am not sure how people are thinking in this manner, but the only way to even have a proper relationship is to do the easy things right and then everyone can move forward from there.

Otherwise, you will have long lasting negative impression that's all.