You had me at hello.

I get stares all the time. It's like people are trying to tell me something but 90% of the time I have no idea what they are trying to say. I am not an expert on body language but I do know that if you notice a body language and it is done in contrived manner- this means that instead of talking, you want to tell a person something- simply by signalling- very often, this will backfire very easily.

For example, let's say, lets say your really like this guy and you desperately want to get his attention and for some reason is that you believed that for example, rather than let's go for lunch or coffee, you flick your hair or swipe your hair in a manner of agreement but an agreement of which no one knows what is agreeing about- then you have put this person in a spot. Since no one knows the question, then how does anyone knows the answer. And if no one really knows what is happening, how does anyone really respond in a manner which is "sociable".

A yes and no, is never a good enough. No one says yes without a "but" and no one says no, without a qualifier. Hence this manner of communication is really anti-social, unless you are a spy of which communication is only possible covertly. Hence since the possibility of anyone being a spy in anyone common social setting is close to zero, therefore isn't a need to engage in such tangential communication.

Look I am a vouyeur, as I walk through the common areas where people walked and passed by frequently or is extremely busy. It is extremely interesting to note how people communicate to each other without really talking to each other. They have the ability to talk to their friends and also signal to passersby their pleasure and displeasure. Sometimes, I don't know whether they are communicating to me or to strangers or are they talking to their friend.

The way  work is quite different. Like for example, when I am talking to someone, I am only talking to this person. This means that even if an elephant walks past, I would not signal to this person. I am not sure whether it is just me or the world has gone so small that everyone is talking to talking to everyone all at the same time without getting through anything.

But I have been began to notice that even people whom are talking to me are noticing all these people signalling all around them and I usually try to concentrate on what I say then bother with so many moving objects hence I am beginning to think that I might have send out the wrong message. I cant really see what is happening behind me or people walking past me from the side. I have no idea what intention they have or these people are intending to do- I just consider them as simply noise. Sometimes I wonder for example if I flick my hair or rub  my eyes, I am not sure whether they think that I am telling them something- I am wondering whether how come an eye cannot get itchy or maybe my contact lens is irritating me that's all.

I perfectly at ease if some stranger come up and say hi and ask how are you- and since this is not the culture around here- I normally just mind my business. Hence I find that all these non-verbal communication is really strange. Ok, if let's this opposite party sees it and understands it, and what is going to happen. If it is a perfect stranger, is it going to be sliding doors and that something surreptitious is going to happen- I am really curious about what goes on in the head of these people.

Are they afraid of talking to stranger but have desire of knowing them better- and in this case, how does doing nothing but flicking and no phone numbers, email addresses and anything is exchanged, what is purpose of the entire episode in the first place. Are you wishing that destiny sees this and somehow, something and someone will arranged for you to meet this rather star-crossed lovers. Its a romantic idea, I am not going to debunk it, but if you keep doing it to everyone, destiny is a faithful partner and it doesn't really like a fickle minded partner, how is that going to help your cause in any way- it continues to puzzle me no end.

And the other day, I spoke to this rather sweet looking cashier, and when I chat with her, she looks like she has seen death but flick her hair incessantly. I might have read her wrongly but normally, the straight road is the best route, and so I have no idea how to navigate this rather ambiguous route. But everytime, I see her, she looks like death to me. So I digress.

I might look a little fierce, but I always strike up a conversation with a cashier as much as I can and no I don't say you have nice hair, I would say like what is good, and normally I would get a deathly smile, and normally I would order my stuff and move along. And if I do see this particular server or cashier and see gives me the same reaction, I will still give a smile since I wouldn't probably be meeting her anytime soon I suppose.

Maybe people are too shy or maybe people are not used to talking to strangers or we just don't have the culture of making small talk, but I do know that if nothing is exchanged, nothing is exchanged, the likelihood of anything is close to zero. Hence why don't, when someone strike a conversation, have a chat, smile like you have met a friend you did not meet for a long time and maybe this person could be a valuable contact- who knows.

Since no one talks to no one on the train and on the bus, and since the likelihood I am going to see you again or remembering seeing you again is close to zero-unless you stalk me [ which I am beginning to think likewise because the coincidences can be so uncanny that it is almost unlikely] I am not obligated to respond in kind in anyway possible.

I don't bite, you can chat with me- and just don't sneak up behind me, because this is very strange. I can help you talk, just don't do really creepy things, I am sure you will find that you will be doing more talking than you expect to. If I look at you flicking your hair, there must be something to look at- and no, I am not going to say hi, not because I am scared, but I will scare you. We have no culture of doing so and I don't think most are comfortable anyway.

But I have done exactly the same thing at clubs and it helps that the darkness and booze lowers people's inhibitions but I have very creepy guys keep sneaking up behind me everytime I start talking to some ladies. It was getting on my nerve but well, I know he is trying to go in on the cheap but this type of behaviour will not get him anyway, and so I let him move around like a mosquito buzzing around my ears. I was in the army, I was used to it.

I have began to realise that this rather strange paranoia have driven people to do really strange things and I have even grown men with kids and mother's with kids signalling at me- which is the exact opposite, and that is totally inappropriate. These grown men looked at me like I had eaten their lunch and that look like they were entitled to something. I am not sure what they are entitled to, but all I know that so long as you have the money, you can go to the restaurant and order anything you want- that is your problem and not mine. I ordered my food and paid for it and so I have every right to eat anywhere and anything I want. You can if you want to, but I am not sure what is holding you back or my eating has interrupted your routine. Since it is a café, I don't see why I democratically cannot have anything i want.

Anyway, I like to think that I am a perfectly reasonable person with quite an accommodating nature- and some even expect me to difficult, but well that's my style, I only run people down with they have been unreasonable and in a social setting, I don't see why I should. But I did told this guy whom knocked my bag in a crowded train and I told him off- he gave me a stare down and I shake his hand and he was more embarrassed than he was when he didn't. You see the people around pretend not to hear anything. That is why, talking in train is just not appropriate.

Sometimes, it is so stressful to stand in the train station because sometimes you feel that your own presence is a hindrance to some people's amorous attempts. Its like a flick of hand or a tap on the phone is interrupting "the moment" with some person on the train. I am sorry, I wasn't doing anything, if it helps, just ignore that I am there.

You see as a person who does this professionally for some time, it might come easy to me while it is harder to other's, but I normally am not difficult to understand. You will find that the moment a chat is started,, you will talk more than I do. But if you think I was trying to make you look bad, or trying to tell you that I am better than you, there isn't anything that I can do about it.

The next time, you do see me on the train, you can chat with me, I am all open, I won't with you because I am afraid that you might feel uncomfortable.

Good night and Good evening