Stomach in, Chin Up.

You see some people believed in this particular concept without actually believing in themselves: emotional blackmail. This means that in the process of trying to convince others, they convince themselves of the rightness of their actions. There are other's whom believed in this utilitarian concept without actually knowing that they are actually applying it.

If you see someone whom justifiably so employs a certain tactic which whom they believed that they are adhering to a higher ideal in which it is for the general interest however disagreeable the tactic it can be, is in reality trying to fulfil an utilitarian ideal. This means that whatever they are doing which many people believed to be improper are justifiably so because they believed it would benefit everyone- this means that there are more happiness for more people in spite of the disagreement and displeasure of the "few".

Actually I am fully aware of the first, which means that people actively engage in emotional blackmail believing that the utility outweighs the moral degradation of it. Hence we break rules in the belief that it will be best for everyone. You see I am not saying such mentality is wrong as since the intention is often benevolent but the means is often misguided and the miscalculation is often that the colletaral damage is often much larger than anticipated.

This means that whoever that does the above for example, one is really in love with this person and believed that whatever one is doing is all for the person's they oftendo not see the that the action can often lead to unanticipated conseqeunces.

I have for some time already realise and I am not happy about many things but for the very reason that this utiliatrain idea is often just approximation in the person's head and no one can ever get it right. Hence I do not wish nor disprove the intention of a person because you don't prove another person's motive wrong but rather the approach is incorrect.

Hence I have been quite silent for some time, the questionable tactics of many for my reasoning is that they must be at the wit's end to come up with these rather desperate measures. Therefore, I do not say that you are wrong and you were incorrect for doing this but rather, I believed that in time to come, they would realise that the end result is often worse than one would have anticpated or have done nothing in the first place at all.

That is exactly why I often do not attempt to stonewall anyone but rather let things glide through simply because there are many things that cannot be forced. In this world of temptations and distractions, many things are never what they seemed. This means that it is easy to believe that euphoria is mistaken as love or some kind of positive emotions attached to a person or an act.

It would then take a brave person to believe that the next best thing is that surrender everything to someone bigger, older or more powerful than yourself- this is often called utilitarian love. This means that since I cannot find someone I love, I settle for someone that help me grow. This is a cop out and it is not love.

But of course, some older folks especially older men begged to differ and believed that they are the source of all forms of love- and passions is nothing more than uncalled for exburence. I have never said the opposite of passion is practicality but of course many would think as wrong and belived that they hold the key to everyone's happiness. Since everything will end badly, might as well go for something that will help you grow.

It is not my business, and it seems like a perfectly plausible argument but I can rest assure you that no one is happy. The men have their second wind and refusing to age gracefully, the women end up believing that they are happy with men old enough to be their grandfather sometimes.

60 year men going for 20 year old ladies is quite disgraceful in my view- I have no idea who these types of people can walk through life like they love each other. Let me rest assure that, there isn't any love there. I think it is like one is sympathy and the other is just close to paternal. It is bordering close to unspeakable.

But of course, I think I would incur the wrath of many of a older men whom believed that I have destroyed their very fantasy but they know it better than me what they feel so I need not say more.

Look, it is very easy for me to get angry for older fat men sleeping with young nubile women- which is like a travesty on earth but if it is not some older fat men, it would be some older horny men, what difference does it make to me any way.

I believed that everyone is old enough to know what they are doing and if they aren't someone would be telling them otherwise, it is not my problem that they think it is perfectly fine and are comfortable with this arranegement. personally, I would feel rather queasy to be seen going out with someone say 18 or 19 years old. The first question I would have is that what does she see in a guy say 13-15 years older than her. Are all her friends that bad and would I be taking away her youth because she is naïve and innocent. I have never met a mature 18 or 19 year old unless he/she screw up really bad earlier. Personally, I have too many reservations to even start thinking about it.

And so if these older men have no reservations and think it is perfectly fine, and assuming that this "love" thing makes sense, what can I say. wish you all the best and just hope both of you know what you are doing because me thinking about it already makes me uneasy no matter how easy it can be.

I think everyone needs someone to love, but it doesn't mean that this can and should lead to desperation. I think like the above, some people mixes these two together. By making someone desperate enough, one will fall in love- personally I never like to be force into anything- and if it is impolite to do so, I will simply zone out. There is no obligation on my end to anything just because someone forces you to make a choice.

Look my idea of love and relationship is very simple, if it is not right, something must be not right, no matter how one can make it otherwise. I think I do not like to be forced, tricked or manipulated into something which one would not otherwise have done. I make it sound like I am being chased and I have a choice. But it makes sense the other way around too. If I do not like to be trick or manipulate, I do not do to others. Even if I end as a monk and priest, it doesn't matter that I end up as one because I think it is more sad to do likewise.

Maybe, I am fated to be a priest or monk or my place leads to somewhere else, it doesn't mean that life is complete only by the very satisfaction of what I think is what other's consider is the only path in life. I really don't know.

And well, I would be quite angry if I have never experienced the trials and tribulations of love, triumph and human foilables, I can rest assure you that no matter how hard one tries, we are not perfect and that is why there is a word called an "ideal" and not "real".

So even if I do not settle down or have a family, I have my legacy in the people that I have influenced and the things that I have impact. I lived through every single one of them whom I have the privilege to meet.

That is why I never have regrets and I always walked through life with my shoulders held high.